Women’s Rights Don’t Extend To Lakes
Don't even think about picking up a pole, girls
American women have been granted the right to vote, the right to own land, the right to work and probably some other stuff that I’m forgetting, but they still haven’t quite secured the right to fish. At least not competitively against men. Australian Kim Bain-Moore is trying to strike a blow for her American counter-parts this week by competing in the Bassmaster Classic, but the good ol’ boys of fishin’ don’t take too kindly to her type ’round here. Before we go any further, let’s get one thing straight. Fishing is not a sport. I mean, it is by the definition of sport like, ‘I hunt for sport’, but not by the definition of sport like ‘this takes athletic ability and is interesting to watch’. Fishing isn’t a sport and any commenter who says otherwise is getting a taste of my spear gun.
Back to the fisherwoman, it’s a complete outrage. Right there it’s clear that women shouldn’t be fishing, I mean who has heard of a fisherwoman? Just like postwoman or pizza girl, fisherwoman is just wrong. Positions for women don’t tack woman on to the title, they have their own specific name like secretary, midwife or prostitute.
Also, how can you go fishing without the ol’ rod and tackle? (To celebrate that joke, please enjoy the Dicktionary) You can’t go hunting without your weapon, you can’t go fishing without your worm and you can’t do something else without some other euphemism for penis. It just isn’t natural.
All the luck in the world goes to Bain-Moore for infiltrating the boys club, but there’s no way they will allow her to win. I hope they have underwater cameras for this thing so we can see the scuba diver who has been paid to attach her hook to tree branches. Those fisherman would kill themselves before they let a woman win the $500,000 grand prize. Wait, you can win half a mil for fishing? Damn it Grandpa, why did you waste my time telling me about how relaxing it was? There’s cash at stake here you old coot.
15 Comments to Women’s Rights Don’t Extend To Lakes
Personally, I blame Danica Patrick.
turkeyshootFebruary 20, 2009
I think it counts as a sport if you actually fish with your penis. As God intended.
southernprideFebruary 20, 2009
fishin is a sport you assholes. it requires athleticism to fight a fish for sometimes up to 4 hours. you little pussies who sit behind a computer all day and make fun of things you dont know how to do or probably have never done shouldnt comment on these things. i challange you to go fishing. you would be worn out after fighting a perch in a farm pond. getout and do something with your life and stop eating cupcakes and get out and do something…you suck
BostonWahooFebruary 20, 2009
Dear southernpride,
Kindly return to your cave o’ confederacy and leave us civilized folks alone.
Thank you,
the rest of the planet
AlexFebruary 20, 2009
Why is it that when I read southernpride’s comment I hear banjos and see a confederate flag waving?
BennyFebruary 20, 2009
I agree with southernpride. You should get out there and do something, like post on internet blogs. No, he doesn’t have a blog himself - or anything for himself for that matter, but his opinion on all things whatever are valid because he’s done something. He posted on a blog.
I disagree with Sothernpride!!
I play hockey, soccer and baseball and I have fished many times. Fishing requires a fraction of the aestheticism needed to play hockey, soccer and even baseball. I would say Fishing is as much of a sport as Poker is and in my opinion less of a sport than Bowling.
southernprideFebruary 20, 2009
you all other people making fun of me probably dont think its athletic to fight fish either. you are just a bunch of fat asses who sit around and complain. my daughter just happened to find this site by searching for bassmasters and she showed me it. this is rediculous and you are nuts. i do agree with no women should fish in our sport but saying its not athletic is nutty
OilerFebruary 20, 2009
Hahahahahahahahaha *Gasp* Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
“Mah Daughter cane look up feeshin’, but by Gawd I’ll Whup ‘er if she ever tries it.”
southernprideFebruary 20, 2009
its not a womans sport. hockey and soccer are womenssports. boston who the hell cares what you yankees think. all you gd liberal progressives are gettin my blood ah boilin. ive played baseball and fishing takes about double the strength and athleticism. i want to see one of yall dive 30 feet and fight a 100 pd cat and i bet yous would come back ded. it takes strength and ability to fight in theyre envirnment. id whip every last one of youre asses.
AlexFebruary 20, 2009
I didn’t realize fishing was a political issue.
BennyFebruary 20, 2009
southernpride needs a weekly column here. His brand of down home thinking is just what this site needs to keep it grounded.
But The Game Is On » Shaquille O’Neal Is The King Of Twitteronia [Afternoon Blogdome]February 20, 2009
[...] • Just kidding, ladies!: A woman is competing in this year’s Bassmaster Classic tournament for the first time ever. I don’t understand—do they need someone to clean the fish? [Bootlegger Sports] [...]
[...] • Just kidding, ladies!: A woman is competing in this year’s Bassmaster Classic tournament for the first time ever. I don’t understand—do they need someone to clean the fish? [Bootlegger Sports] [...]
Southernpride, lol, athletic fishing 
for who? the fish?
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February 20, 2009