It’s Not Even Wednesday Yet Dump

Because why wouldn't you stuff a kitten in your bra?

This is what happens when you raise your kids to be douchebag brats.  The best part is when he acts like he’s going to hit his dad with the bat, and his dad doesn’t just beat the piss out of him. Gee, I wonder how he turned out so shitty?  <homework4dummies>

D-Wade has said he’ll only re-sign with the Heat if they can become a contender by next year.  This guy must think that’s possible, because he certainly isn’t implying that Megan Fox and her amazing body aren’t good at acting.  She could stand there reading her lines off of giant cue cards on screen and as long as she wasn’t wearing a Snuggie and a gorilla mask she would still make any movie 100% better.  <barkleysmouth>

Speaking of Megan Fox!  Remember the pictures of Megan Fox topless with those weird things covering her nipples?  Of course you do.  Well that was for the filming of this movie.  Apparently she’s a demon that seduces boys and them rips them apart with her teeth.  And of course this fate would be absolutely fine with me.  If you don’t feel it move when she utters the line “I go both ways” then you’re either dead or paralyzed from the waste down.  I know these things because I pretend to be a doctor when I go to Vegas.  (Preview is Rated R for language)  <screenjunkies>

In the entire history of the Cincinnati Reds, which dates back to right after the close of the Civil War, they never got their asses beat as badly as they did last night.  Congratulations!  <bigleaguestew>

Mexico builds boarder wall to keep out American Assholes.  I suggest you pause when it gets to the list of answers Americans give to the question “Who is the President of Mexico?”  <onion>

Ron Artest has made a tribute song for Michael Jackson.  And it’s absolutely just as retarded as everyone who isn’t Ron Artest expects it to be.  Language NSFW.  <neswsports>

Something about ESPN in England covering soccer and how hard it’s going to be.  They have to go quickly or bears will attack Scotland I think.  Not really sure because I didn’t read more than a few words scattered throughout the article.  I would have read more, but I’ve been looking at pictures of cats stuffed down girls’ shirts.  <awfulannouncing>

The University of Oklahoma seems to take family ties to the extreme.  It’s notable that the Griffin brothers didn’t even make this list.  <huggingharoldreynolds>

Once again baseball in the Midwest returns to the realm of obscurity and mediocrity.  When does college football start up again?  <notqualifiedtocomment>

Send story ideas and link tips to bootleggersports@gmail.com.  I’d say something clever here, but I watched the Megan Fox trailer again and now I’m late for work with a hard-on that won’t stop.

Tags: link dump

No comments yet.

Leave a comment