Chuck Long Might Be Your New Hero

Long stifles a giddy laugh as another injury puts him closer to easy street

San Diego State hired Chuck Long as their new football head coach before the 2006 season.  Last November, they realized their mistake and dismissed him.  That means he’s no longer coaching the Aztecs, but it apparently doesn’t mean that he doesn’t still work on the campus.  And he’s planning on staying for a LONG time!  Hahaha…sorry.

Long is getting paid his full salary of $715,900 through the end of 2010 or until he lands a new job.  But let’s be honest here, why look for a new job when you are getting paid nearly three-quarters of a million to do nothing.  Oh, sorry, Chuck Long insists I inform you that it’s not ‘nothing’, it’s “projects and analysis” in his on-campus office.  I’m guessing that means he’s in his 23rd year of a dynasty on EA Sports’ NCAA Football. 

San Diego State isn’t pleased with the details of the contract that they drew up and offered to Long only three years ago, so they are now paying $125-an-hour to an outside consultant whose only job is to find a loophole to get rid of Long.  The Aztecs athletic department probably doesn’t have enough money to pay 2 football coaches, so I understand their thinking.  But what’s stopping this outside contractor from camping out and going the Chuck Long route?  His job is to study how Long managed to secure a bunch of money for doing nothing.  Eventually, he’s going to get the idea that he too get be getting paid for doing nothing, at least until the end of 2010.  If he’s working even close to full-time, he could make more than $200k this year.  That is, as long as he doesn’t do something stupid like fulfill his job requirement and get rid of Long. 

Even if he does find a way to boot Long off campus, there’s going to be appeals and court dates and arbitration that will probably last through 2010 anyway.  San Diego State’s best bet is to start watching old Looney Tunes and trying to figure out how to lure Long into a big box and shoot him into space.  They may want to try writing USC Trojans on the box and putting a $1-million dollar contract in it. 

Bootlegged from Dr. Saturday

Tags: Chuck Long, football, NCAA, San Diego State

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