Arizona Cardinals Would Like To Take Your Order

Not until Anquan Boldin gets me a chili dog

The Arizona Sports and Tourism Authority, which owns University of Phoenix Stadium, is apparently having some tough times.  They lost money last year and their 2009-2010 budget is projected to have a $3.4-million deficit.  This never would have happened had McCain been elected. 

University of Phoenix Stadium is most notably home to the Arizona Cardinals and the Tostitos’ Fiesta Bowl.  If you think a BCS bowl is going to get some positive pub here, you obviously haven’t been here before.  Nice to meet you though, enjoy your stay. 

The Cardinals have launched a plan to market the stadium to potential sponsors and non-football events in exchange for handling all the concession stands.  I believe that means they finally found something for Matt Leinart to do.  ‘Hi, I’m Matt, would you like to try our Hail Mary Nachos with Cardinal Red salsa?’ 

The Cards will likely miss out on a golden opportunity to generate good will for their franchise.  They’ll probably use their newfound concession responsiblities to hire more people from the community.  That’s all well and good, but it’s not interesting.  The answer lies with every high school sports team and band in America.  Let the team members work the concession stand.  The fans will feel more of a connection with the team when a player makes a special teams tackle and they can exclaim ‘that guy sold me a beer in this commemorative cup!’  And players won’t feel so bad for being 3rd string.  They’ll still be of use and won’t have to dread that embarrassing camera shot of them picking their nose on the sideline. 

To even things out, the starters can work the non-football events.  When Rod Stewart is in town, sell some extra tickets by advertising that Larry Fitzgerald will be on hot dog duty.  Kurt Warner on the cash register could generate some interest for the next Christian rock concert.  Husbands won’t be skipping the home and garden show when Antrel Rolle is around to sell them a hot pretzel.  And fans will be a little more willing to hear about a player’s bloated salary if he’s putting in extra work at the concession stand.  That side job could even generate understanding for a down year.  ‘Well, Tim Hightower may not have even sniffed one-thousand yards this year, but that man can sure poor a beer.  Look at this, just the right amount of head!’

Tags: Arizona Cardinals, football, NFL

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