Inflatable Tuesday Dump

This marks the 4th time in my life that I've envied tile

You might have noticed a big floppy cock wobblingaround the screen if you watched the golf at the American Century Championship.  And I don’t mean Michael Jordan for his tipping habits, I mean a huge inflatable dick that served as the backdrop to a bachelorette beach party right behind MJ.  Screen cap and full, first-hand account here.  P.S. Cops are dicks.  <bustedcoverage>

Reggie Theus thinks sports bloggers are a pain in the ass.  But I think the opinions of unemployed people bother me less than the opinions of bloggers bother him.  Also, aren’t you painting with a bit of a wide brush there Reg?  Just because there are blogs like Bootlegger Sports doesn’t mean you should assume all the other ones are run by irresponsible redneck assholes.  Such general statements are rarely ever true, like if someone said “cops are dicks.”  Oh hey.  <sportressofblogitude>

Peyton Manning’s “behind the scenes” video from the ESPYs.  It’s funny, but it also serves as a reminder of how happy I am that I didn’t watch the ESPYs.  Plus, I think Peyton loves face time more than my girlfriend does.  Haha! Get it?  Zing! High five! I bet I hear about that one tonight… Know what I’m saying?  She’ll be all like “You’re…”  um…  ”You’re so”… Yeah.  I don’t actually talk to real girls, so I don’t know what it is that they’re supposed to say so much.  <neswsports>

Why North Carolina is going to be a force on the hardwood again this year.  With a prelude that serves as a perfect example for why I can only bring myself to root for the Tar Heels when they’re playing Duke.  <the5thcorner> 

A frat boy gives his take on sporting news from the last week.  This parody is so spot-on it might actually have been written by a frat guy, which makes me sad while I’m laughing out loud.  <stylepoints>

Are the Pittsburgh Pirates going to try to use Garrett Jones’ hot streak to justify unloading more talented players who have already established themselves in at the MLB level?  I think we may have touched on the reason why nobody shows up to Pirates games.  <paneech>

Why you may see Padres fans rooting against Kevin Kouzmanoff.  Of course I don’t care if he’s batting .050, it’s still too much to pay for an f-ing Bud Light.  <huggingharoldreynolds>

Do I have to include anything in this description other than “Miranda Kerr” and “Victoria’s Secret”?  Nope?  Okay then.  <moondogsports>

Charles Barkley gives his opinions on Tiger Woods, and how his legacy stacks up against Michael Jordan’s.  I find Sir Charles’ views on blowjobs much more entertaining than golf.  Then again I generally find anything about anything more entertaining than golf.  <awfulannouncing>

Send story ideas and link tips to bootleggersports@gmail.com.  But you have to send them in before 5:30 AM Central Time, because that’s how much my life sucks.

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