Michael Jordan Still Doesn’t Suck

If any of you are biding your time, hoping to run into Michael Jordan once he is old, hobbled and unable to play the game he once excelled at, as I am, in order to earn bragging rights about beating MJ at basketball, well, the wait continues.  He’s not quite ripe for upset yet.  Maybe next decade.

Here’s the greatest of all-time shows off the fade-away jumper that was the final piece in his unstoppable offensive game.  Granted, the defender is a full two-inches shorter than Jordan and plays SlamBall, but if you look at it another way, he’s not some scrub blogger.

It seems unfair that a 46-year-old can do the things against an above average athlete that MJ does in this video, but if you ever had a question as to whether or not Jordan sold his soul to the devil, well now you have your answer.  Normal 46-year-olds are thinking about retiring from beer-league softball and reach for the Icy Hot after strenuous activity like tying their shoes.  Were Jordan human, this video would have ended just after his attempted standing reverse dunk, as he came up a good 8-inches short and immediately grabbed for his hamstring.

Then again, old men can flat out shoot the rock.  Find the worst player in your pick-up game, advance him 20 years and watch him go 10-for-10, flat-footed from mid-range.  If you think your buddy is getting a little full of himself, take him to the nearest retirement center and have him square off in a game of horse against the nearest octogenarian without a load in his pants.  Nothing humbles you faster than a guy who can’t chew his own food throwing in buckets underhand style.

I guess if Jordan progresses that way, he’ll be nearly unstoppable by the time he’s sixty.  I say nearly because there’s always the great equalizer of simply waiting for the elderly to fall asleep and then taking advantage of them…on the basketball court…perv.

Tags: basketball, Michael Jordan, SlamBall

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