Return to Keeley Dump

I've seen whores with better make-up jobs.

Somehow, this loyal Cubs fan continues to support Milton Bradley’s actions over the past year.  Even though he’s gone now.  If all Chicagoans were like this they’d be giving Steve Bartman standing ovations at the Friendly Confines. <notqualifiedtocomment>

Just as unbelievable as the Bradley-defending Cubs fan, we have Jim Brown and Joshua Cribbs sticking up for Eric Mangini.  This just in, Brown and Cribbs hate Cleveland and love watching it suffer.  Now I’m just waiting on the Mayor of New Orleans to defend President Bush.  <midwestsportsfans>

Chicago’s famed Hop Haus, which is located just a few blocks from Wrigley Field, has a giant mural of the Windy City’s sports legends.  They just added this bitter couple to their wall, proving once again that while some guys might be so nice as to forgive people like Milton Bradley, most of the city will wish you a violent death at the hands of Brian Urlacher for ruining a Bears season.  <deadspin>

In the Steelers-Packers game, two linemen got their face masks stuck together.  I’d never seen this happen before this season, and now I’ve seen it twice.  It looks like two dogs post-coitus, both stuck together and neither one happy about it.  <outsidetheboxscore>

I decided long ago that only gamblers, fantasy owners and retards watch the NBA in December.  And that’s unfortunate, because only that savory bunch got to see the Kings post one of the greatest comebacks in sports against the Bulls last night.  If only all the games weren’t fixed and the players actually tried.  Think how amazing that would have been.  <detroit4lyfe>

A bunch of assholes in Southern California wish to remind the rest of us that winter sucks really hard, and it’s only just beginning.  Makes me feel like listening to Aenima by Tool.  <holytaco>

I can’t believe it.  UT return man, D.J. Monroe, got his drunk driving charges dropped right before the National Championship game, and is back with the team.  Unbelievably great news!  I bet something this fortunate has never happened to a football player in Texas before a big game.  <espn>

That’s it for the ol’ dumper this morning, because I got about 3 hours of sleep last night.  I don’t want to go into details, but it involved a pair of dice, a rubber hose and a fishing rod that can never be used again.  Send link tips and story suggestions to bootleggersports@gmail.com. 

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1 Comment to Return to Keeley Dump

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December 28, 2009

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