Little Black Tuesday Dump

Dresses are like trails, they're meant to be hiked

Speaking of trails and nudity: Joel Pryzbilla used to play for the PortlandTrail Blazers.  He might do so again, but first he has to learn to not slip in the shower.  This is the worst shower-related injury since Troy Polamalu dropped the soap in front of Roethlisberger.  <thatnbalotterypick>

Javon Walker has finally been released by the Oakland Raiders, officially making him a $55 million mistake.  In perspective, that makes my $400 mistake seem like a much better deal.  And speaking of abortions, how come it’s always the guys who get stuck footing the bill for those?  I already bought dinner and the condoms we didn’t use.  Jeeze, what more do you want from me?  <justblogbaby>

And since we’re on the topic; is it worth getting a vasectomy just so you can stay home for the opening rounds of the NCAA Tournament?  You couldn’t just take vacation time and go to Vegas, and then look for any opportunity to brag about it like I’m doing?  And it doesn’t matter if you’ve been snipped or not in Vegas, because your name is Lance Hardy, and “yeah baby, I got that done two years ago, it’s all right.”  <neswsports>

Without LeBron and Shaq, Cleveland still held off San Antonio.  Speaking of Shaq, he sure has been staying out of headlines a lot lately.  That’s more worrisome than this new mole on my chest.  <midwestsportsfan>

I never had a semi-attractive English teacher send me naked pictures of herself while I was in high school.  That makes me almost as sad as the mental image of the English teachers I did have taking naked photos.  <bustedcoverage>

In honor of all the Spring Break mistakes about to be made by young men and women all over the continent, here are some of the best facebook pictures of SB activities.  They don’t say so, but I argue that this might be NSFW, so be careful.  Speaking of being careful, these pictures are an STD’s wet dream.  <coed>

Big Ben is in big trouble.  At least I thought he was.  Then I learned that his lawyer is the same guy that kept Ray Lewis out of prison for killing that guy.  Wouldn’t it be nice to be rich enough that rape and murder didn’t have consequences?  <espn>

That’s all kids.  It’s Tuesday, and Tuesdays suck.  So send us fun things.  Send them to bootleggersports@gmail.com. 

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