BS March Madness Preview- South

Something tells me this region is worth watching

Did you think we could stop after just one region?  Of course not.  There are 48 teams out there whose fans haven’t been offended yet.  The South features player of the year pre-season favorite Tyler Hansbrough and player of the year likely winner Blake Griffin.  They can both meet up and decide who is better in the stands of the regional final while two other teams fight for the Final Four. 

1. North Carolina- Ty Lawson may not be 100-percent and Roy Williams may not play with his glasses the entire tournament.  But who are we kidding.  Let the Hansbrough/Lawson slurp-fest begin. 

16. Radford- The name test applies.  Does Radford really sound like a school with a great basketball team?  I bet their field hockey and squash programs are beasts though. 

8. LSU- Some schools can get away with only using their initials.  How can Louisiana State get away with this?  The swamp rats that cheer for the Tigers can’t spell Louisiana. 

9. Butler- They’re quickly becoming a mid-major tournament lock like Gonzaga.  They only need to become vastly over-rated and book an early tournament exit to complete the transformation. 

5. Illinois- Chester Frazier is hurt but they are touted as the best offensive team in the Big 10, except for maybe Michigan State.  That means they must average like 45 points per game. 

12. Western Kentucky- The Hilltopper’s mascot is a big red blob.  Maybe it’s a hill.  Maybe it’s a blood vessel.  Maybe it’s an Indian with Downs Syndrome.  It won’t be around long enough for me to look it up. 

4. Gonzaga- They used to be Cinderellas who came out of nowhere and made deep runs in the tourney.  No part of that statement has been true in quite a while. 

13. Akron- LeBron James is from Akron.  He even made a shoe with the city’s skyline on it.  He didn’t go to school there though.  That doesn’t bode well for the Zips. 

6. Arizona State- James Harden is great and he boasts perhaps the best beard in the tournament.  Too bad that beard also poses as the Sundevils second best player. 

11. Temple- John Chaney is gone, so how are the Owls supposed to win without the threat of broken limbs?  Fran Dunphy used to coach Penn, so he could, uh, threaten players with reading assignments?  As a side note, Dionte Christmas has the coolest name in the tourney. 

3. Syracuse- Chris Brown is a huge Syracuse fan after he and Eric Devendorf met in an online chatroom for men who beat women and aren’t punished.  Bootlegger Bryan contributed the seed for that joke because he’s better than you… and the Orange. 

14. Stephen F. Austin- He’s the father of Texas, so his kids must be drive-through liquor stores and porn shops.  A drunken, horny basketball team could prove to be quite a handful.  Too bad their opponents aren’t Mexicans. 

7. Clemson- The Tigers used to be highly ranked, then they remembered, or were reminded Clemson doesn’t run the ACC.  Now that they’re out of league play, maybe they’ll return to prominence.  Not likely.  First person to name Clemson’s coach without looking it up gets dap. 

10. Michigan- John Beilein’s offense got off the ground much faster than Rich Rodriguez’s did.  At the end of the day though, they’re still going to be even in post-season wins. 

2. Oklahoma- OMG Blake Griffin!  LOL the rest of the roster.  Time will tell if Griffin gets the Carmelo treatment in the tournament or the Michael Beasley treatment in the tournament.  That would be the difference between a title and a second round exit. 

15. Morgan State- Their point guard’s name is Itchy and their coach admitted to paying a player at a previous coaching stop (Cal).  They have all the makings of a big time program, except the talent of course.

Tags: Akron, Arizona State, Blake Griffin, Butler, Clemson, Gonzaga, Illinois, James Harden, John Beilein, LSU, Michigan, Morgan State, North Carolina, Oklahoma, Radford, Stephen F. Austin, Syracuse, Temple, Western Kentucky