Something is Wrong With The Titans

The NFL franchise in Tennessee has been anything but the Titans of their industry this season.  See what I did there?  Their name is the Titans, but they lose all the time.  Almost non-stop.  Up until yesterday’s game against Jacksonville, I could have just said they lose non-stop, but they had to go and ruin that by stomping the Jaguars 30-13.

That entire game was essentially a contest between Chris Johnson and Jacksonville running back Maurice Jones-Drew to see who could make CBS commentator Gus Johnson explode from excitement first.  As you can see from the included video, it appears Johnson won that contest too.

You may have noticed Johnson using the following line to describe Johnson, “he’s got gettin’ away from the cops speed.”  If you’ve been a frequent or even occasional visitor to this site, you also may have noticed that I am OK with anything Gus Johnson does.  So he compared Johnson running for the end zone to a fugitive running from the authorities, isn’t that a colorful and descriptive way to describe the action?  I believe that’s his job.

And don’t even think about turning this into a racist statement.  Oh, what if Jim Nantz had said this, he would be in so much trouble.  Maybe, but we don’t have to worry about this because Jim Nantz doesn’t have a sense of humor…or a personality.

Plus, does anyone remember former Virginia football player Marquis Weeks, who described a 100-yard kick-off return as “kind of like running from the cops”?

Look, CBS sticks Gus with the worst game of the week, nearly every week.  They give him a tiny viewing audience and two terrible teams, at least let him be himself.  It’s not like anyone was watching Tennessee vs. Jacksonville anyway.

Gus Johnson’s comments may have opened the public’s eyes to a growing problem within the Titans’ organization, however.  No one would have suspected anything if his ‘gettin’ away from the cops’ line had stood by itself, but then came this line from the AP story on the game:

Vince Young felt good but nervous before his first start this season for the Tennessee Titans. He wound up celebrating with his offensive coordinator and getting high [end of line]             grades from the team owner who wanted him back on the job.

That’s an odd phrasing, don’t you think?  It’s almost like the media wants us to know something about the Titans but they’re unable to report it officially.  I think they are trying to tell us that the Titans aren’t exactly law abiding, even when compared to their NFL brethren.  And as you know, as a general rule, NFL players follow the law like English as a Second Language students follow The Great Gatsby.

Video bootlegged from Awful Announcing

Tags: CBS, Chris Johnson, Gus Johnson, Jacksonville Jaguars, Maurice Jones-Drew, Tennessee Titans, Vince Young

Good Morning, Gus Johnson

By now you’ve almost certainly seen Brandon Stokley hilariously break the hearts of the Bengals with this tip-drill TD catch.  As this was happening, I was struggling to stay awake as the Kansas City-Baltimore game wound down…and I didn’t wake up until well after noon yesterday.  I guess I’ll never understand why Gus Johnson isn’t the number one voice for CBS football and basketball and isn’t broadcast to most of the country.  Well, I kind of understand if it’s the same reason Jay Leno is ‘America’s most popular TV host’.  That being that old people no longer can recognize what is good and what is bland and terrible.  If you’re over 55, first off, kudos for being able to find this site, but second, don’t voice your opinions anymore.  Your time has past.  When I’m as old as you, I would gladly pass my decision making abilities on to the younger generation except that clearly I’ll be awesome and youthful forever.  Now I’m off to chug an energy drink and download the latest underground indie rock album that you’ll never hear because your corporate radio is too commercial.

Bootlegged from Awful Announcing

Tags: Brandon Stokley, CBS, Denver Broncos, football, Gus Johnson, NFL

Tim Brando Wins the Great Debate

You know how people in the South are kind of backward and stupid, especially college football fans who will call in to radio shows to harass the guest?  Good, just making sure we’re on the same page here.  CBS’ Tim Brando got all riled up while appearing on the Paul Finebaum Show courtesy of an Auburn fan.  This is the first I’m hearing of Paul Finebaum but I think it’s great he has his own show, it’s about time, he’s been paying his dues for years.  Brando on the other hand, usually a cheerleader for the SEC, has had some negative things to say about Auburn recently, mostly centered around their choices regarding their football coaching staff. 

That is to say, firing their offensive coordinator after 4 games because the new spread offense wasn’t working and then replacing him with Tulsa’s offensive coordinator who specializes in the… wait can this be right… spread offense, and firing Tommy Tuberville and replacing him with a 5 career win man known as Gene Chizik, is completely idiotic.  Auburn fans, or at least one drunken redneck, tend to disagree. 

The person I feel worst for in this whole debaucle is Matt.  Poor Matt, he just wanted to call in and hear his voice on the radio, but instead he gets bombarded by the lingering testosterone spraying out of Tim Brando’s mouth.  Matt, if you’re out there, it’s not your fault buddy.  Just remember that it’s not your fault.

Tags: Auburn, CBS, Gene Chizik, NCAA, Paul Finebaum, Tim Brando, Tommy Tuberville