NFL Asks Players To Read Before It’s Too Late

Based on the list of symptoms, my girlfriend gets a concussion once a month.

First off, let me apologize for the lack of content lately.  I could just tell you that Robbie is a lazy jackass and we could all nod knowingly together for a few moments and then move on.  But, I also saw Inception over the weekend and it has taken me a few days to unscramble my brain.  Not from the  movie, but from how hot Leo is.  fans self I didn’t catch much of the plot…something about elephants.

Anyway, concussions in football have been a hot topic lately, like Twilight t-shirts and studded belts.  See…cause its a store…nevermind.

The NFL, being chiefly comprised of men of action, and Al Davis, has come up with a proactive way to solve the problem. Free posters for every team! Oh God I hope my team gets Leo riding a unicorn under a waterfall!

The poster is actually the one pictured above.  Pretty damn boring and way too wordy for it to catch anyone’s eye.  It’s not nearly as helpful as the idea I presented:

SEX!!

Now that I have your attention concussions are bad.

This poster will hang in the locker rooms of every NFL team, likely behind a door so that when the door is opened, the poster is obscured.  Essentially, this poster is just like the OSHA poster that hangs in your workplace.  No one will read it until they’re waiting for the paramedics.

The league used to hand out pamphlets with health facts about the brain from 1965.

Your Brain and You!

Your brain is a complex series of tubes and wires, when you get a concussion, those wires can come apart.  Thankfully, the NFL employs the best health care workers in the world and concussions are no more a concern than Los Angeles being without a professional team.

So get out there and win…and don’t forget to always lead with your head.

Seriously though, it did say this:

Current research with professional athletes has not shown that having more than one or two concussions leads to permanent problems if each injury is treated properly.

Chris Henry’s brain would like to have a word with the “current research” of 2007.

The new literature says this:

Repetitive brain injury, when not treated promptly and properly may cause permanent damage to your brain.

A slight improvement, but still far away from the more dramatic and realistic:

FOOTBALL MAKES YOU STUPIDER!

Apparently, one draft of the poster also tried to guilt players into behaving correctly by showing youngsters playing a variety of sports with the tagline: “Other athletes are watching.”  I would imagine that that particular idea was abandoned when they remembered that the posters would be posted in locker rooms, where everyone pretends that other athletes are, in fact, not sneaking a peek.

Tags: concussions, football, NFL