Tim Tebow for Heisman

Doesn't his handwriting look like Mack Brown's?

Bootlegger Sports crack research department has done it again.  We’ve managed to unearth Tim Tebow’s Heisman Ballot, but we don’t have all the answers.  Such as, why did Tebow leave his 3rd choice blank?  Was he waiting for a divine miracle to fill it in for him?  Does he believe that 3, as half of 6, is a tool of the devil?  Or did one of the legions of fine ass Tebow chasers distract him just long enough to make him miss it? 

Whatever the answer, he probably could’ve used that extra number one vote to edge Sam Bradford.

Tags: Florida, Heisman, NCAA, Oklahoma, Sam Bradford, Tim Tebow

Colt McCoy is The Deer Hunter

Texas quarterback Colt McCoy got overlooked a lot this season.  Graham Harrell stole his thunder when the Longhorns fell to Texas Tech on the final play, and Sam Bradford of Oklahoma stole his Heisman.  But this deer, well no longer will Colt have to suffer this deer’s insolence. 

Reportedly, the deer was running a blog called “The Real McCoy” where he published embarrassing stories and pictures from the UT star’s youth.  The final straw was when a picture of his first time on a big boy potty showed up on the website.  That’s when it was time for some vigilante justice.  McCoy put in a call to Chuck Norris, but the Texas Ranger was busy campaigning for McCain (everyone was afraid to tell him), so Colt picked up his rifle and remarked “This ends now!” 

Witnesses say the deer was shopping for groceries, frustrating other customers by checking out in the express lane with well over 10 items, when the QB found him.  “The buck stops here” yelled McCoy, and after firing, reloading, firing again, reloading again, and firing once more, the mighty deer blogger fell. 

“Let’s see Sam Bradford do this!” Colt exclaimed as he loaded the carcass into his pick-up, unaware that at that very moment, the Heisman winner was breaking the neck of the world’s richest, most powerful bear.

Tags: Colt McCoy, football, Graham Harrell, Heisman, NCAA, Oklahoma, Sam Bradford, Texas, Texas Tech

Billy Sims is Embarrassing

Oklahoma quarterback Sam Bradford took home the school’s 5th Heisman this past weekend, but the festivities weren’t without incident.  Former OU running back and Heisman winner Billy Sims marred the celebration by his repeated outbursts of “Boomer” before, during and after the presentation of the trophy.  Fans’ message boards have been alive in the recent days with folks bashing the former Sooner and with good cause. 

The Heisman trophy awards ceremony is a stoic, somber affair.  A time when a young, talented quarterback’s dreams of a national championship and succesful pro career are ripped away and replaced with a bronze statue.  Bradford’s life ended on Saturday, like Jason White, Gino Torretta, Chris Weinke, Eric Crouch and so many others before him, and all Sims could do was dig into the newly formed wound by sarcastically prodding the young man. 

Bradford took the below the belt blows in stride, going as far as to announce his love for Sims, but the former running back should know better.  His life consists of signing autographs at card shows and running a semi-succesful chain of barbecue restaurants and in three years, Sam will be in the same boat.  Show some support for your future-brother in the bbq game Billy.

Tags: Billy Sims, football, Heisman, NCAA, Oklahoma University, Sam Bradford

Saturday Notes

Sam Bradford wins the Heisman- Challenges Bob Stoops’ second chin for biggest thing in Norman. 

Mo Cheeks fired as Sixers coach- Will he finally use his name for its intended purpose?  Jazz musician or pornstar.

Riddick Bowe won a fight- I checked my calendar three times to make sure I hadn’t traveled back to 1994.

ESPN Bowl Week Promos started- I love bowls, but shouldn’t the best week of the year be shorter, not twice as long?

Jerome James made a field goal for the Knicks- That devalues his contract to $10 million per basket, or in his terms: about 1.5 million supersized number 4’s. 

The sub-division college football playoffs continued- I’m so ready for the San Diego County Credit Union Poinsetta Bowl so I can see some real football.

Temple and UMass pulled upsets on the hardwood- Which means John Chaney and Travis Ford have something in common.  They’re officially regretting their decision to leave.

Tags: Bob Stoops, ESPN, football, Heisman, Jerome James, John Chaney, Mo Cheeks, New York Knicks, Oklahoma, Philadelphia 76ers, Riddick Bowe, Sam Bradford, Temple, Travis Ford, UMass

Bootlegger Sports Heisman Preview

The 2008 Heisman Trophy will awarded Saturday night and we here at Bootlegger Sports want you to be fully prepared for the drawn-out, totally meaningless ceremony.  So, here’s what we know.

There are three finalists:

Florida Quarterback, Prophet, and Dreamboat Tim Tebow

Oklahoma Quarterback and human-rat hybrid Sam Bradford

Texas Quarterback and short-bus rider Colt McCoy

Heisman Voters Don’t Like to Make History:  Tebow won the award last season and Archie Griffin of Ohio State is the only player to win two trophies, so Timmy won’t be walking away with another award this season.  It’s just fine to be the first to do something, like being the first black president, then all of America (except the South) applauds you.  But God forbid you break someone’s record, then none of America (except the South) roots for you. 

Heisman Voters Have Short Memories: Colt McCoy had an amazing stretch of games early in the Big 12 season, but that might as well have been in the 80’s because no one remembers it.  His time in the national spotlight ended when Michael Crabtree “seen it in my mind.”  Have his numbers gotten worse?  No, but he’s faded into obscurity like the rest of his learning disabled class.

Heisman Voters Don’t Learn From Their Mistakes: Jason White, Andre Ware and Ty Detmer… do these names sound familiar?  Unless you’ve been buying insurance or used cars lately probably not.  Sure, Ware is an analyst for ESPN, but he’s terrible so let’s move on.  The point is, all three won Heismans because they were a cog for unstoppable throw it first offenses.  None won anything big on the field or went on to success in the NFL.  Not that you have to turn into a great pro to be deserving of the Heisman, but I’d prefer the best player get the award, not some interchangeable spare part.  Colt McCoy and Tim Tebow will have similar numbers whether they play for OU, UT, or UF, but Sam Bradford’s numbers will only go down.  This should go into consideration, but Heisman voters obviously aren’t concerned with logical arguments.  The rat-man is your Heisman winner… I mean really, did Splinter from the Ninja Turtles have a kid?

Tags: Colt McCoy, Florida, football, Heisman, NCAA, Oklahoma, Sam Bradford, Texas, Tim Tebow