Jimmy Clausen Takes One For The Team

Somebody please punch this dude in the face...oh right

The Notre Dame faithful are a proud group that backs their team no matter what.  But, even though they will continue to cheer on their beloved Irish, that doesn’t mean they don’t feel entitled to some retribution after their team forced them to witness a debacle like a home loss to Connecticut.  One free shot to Jimmy Clausen’s face will do just fine, thank you.

At first, I had planned to make the headline of this post: ‘Jimmy Clausen Got Punched In The Face’ and then just fill the body up with ‘hahahhahaa’.  But, I felt like that would a cold, callous reaction to this incident.  I mean, Jimmy Clausen absolutely has deserved at least one sucker-punch to the face in his life, so this fan was probably justified in his actions.  And there are people across this great land of ours that have wished someone would punch Clausen in the face at some time.  So, hmm, what was my point?  Maybe I should have stuck with the laughter idea.

I would like to congratulate this fan who will now likely face legal action.  Way to make your one chance count and well done showing some restraint.  I mean, here’s Jimmy Clausen and you’ve got the stones to just clock him as he’s walking out of a bar.  If you’ve gone that far, why wouldn’t you keep hitting him or at least kick him a couple of times.  You know what they say about Jimmy Clausen, ‘bet you can’t hit him just once.’

By the way, if this is going to become a regular thing and people are going to start exacting vigilante justice on athletes they feel have wronged them, somebody should make some money out of it.  I’d be on the phone right now if there was a ‘athlete hitman’ who would sock sports hero of your choosing.  Oh, Jared Allen’s jaw would be so broken.  Hopefully, on Tuesdays, there’s a special where a punch in the face comes with a complimentary knee to the groin.  If not, I have a coupon.

Tags: football, Jimmy Clausen, NCAA, Notre Dame

Fire Up The Douche Machine

Here Mark was finally rounding into the form that John David Booty never achieved… I don’t mean as a quarterback, I mean as a pretty, frat boy looking douche, and he up and leaves for the league.  Now Carroll will have to hope that back ups Mitch Mustain and Aaron Corp respond well to the douche cloning machine in the offseason or else the Trojans will be left with a potentially likable QB, and we all know they can’t win a championship that way. 

Ed. Note- No chance Corp makes the huge strides necessary and although Mustain has the attitude already and probably only needs a little hair gel, my money’s on dark horse incoming freshman Matt Barkley.  We haven’t seen douche potential like this since Jimmy Clausen signed on to destroy Notre Dame.

Now you may be saying, oh everyone is hating on USC these days, it’s so cliche and easy.  Yes it is, and fun too.  Sometimes you just gotta say “damn what people will think, I’ve gotta do what I love”.  Even if that has led to such travesties as Bruce Willis the singer, Charles Barkley the golfer and Paris Hilton the not a corpse.

Tags: Aaron Corps, Chris Mortensen, ESPN, Jimmy Clausen, John David Booty, Mark Sanchez, Matt Barkley, Mitch Mustain, NFL, Notre Dame, Pete Carroll, Shelley Smith, USC