The Dog Days of Rays’ Hazing

Shockingly, this is Tampa's best pitching prospect

It seems there’s some hypocrisy about hazing in today’s society.  What isn’t OK for high school teams or fraternities, is just fine for professional franchises.  So nobody has died from being duct taped to a goal post yet, it’s only a matter of time.  The Tampa Bay Rays continued a tradition of rookie hazing at spring training by forcing the new kids to dress as hula dancers and serve drinks.  Manager Joe Madden sat back with the rest of the coaching staff and took notes.  If a rookie can’t serve a drink well, he’s got no shot at making the team. 

Considering the prospects were told to “shake their coconuts for tips”, it’s only a matter of time before a Rays’ player gets sued for sexual harassment or assault.  Fun is fun, but teaching players these types of lessons can only end with Evan Longoria getting a little too aggressive with a slightly manish Hooters waitress.  You’ll only have yourselves to blame, Rays’ fans, when your best players are suspended for the stretch run. 

An epidemic of sexual misconduct would be exponentially more entertaining than the current steroids epidemic though.  Maybe not for the women involved, but as an on-looker, I say go for it.  Finally, instead of shrinking testicles and injections in the buttocks, we can talk about groping of breasts and inappropriate phone calls.  It’s like a renaissance for all the reporters who covered the Clinton administration.

Tags: baseball, Evan Longoria, Joe Madden, MLB, spring training, Tampa Bay Rays